“On this Day” Repost – Size 20

Yeah, you know I love this little “On This Day” thing on FB, and today it gave me this one from 3 years ago. Here is the link to the original post.  It was great to read some of the nice comments left, and downright weird to read my responses – sometimes I just don’t feel that I type like me!.

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So yes, I’m size 20 – an incontrovertible fact,
I’m way past cuddly and curvy, so let’s just call me fat.

“She must be greedy and lazy, to let herself get to that size”,
they speak without understanding, one day they may realise.

It’s so much more than just eating – this chaos that lives in my brain,
compounded of joyful memories, and bottomless buckets of pain.

The food is only a symptom, of things I cannot control,
for though I am shattered and broken, once I was boundlessly whole.

I know it is not the real answer, to things that go “bump in the night”
but just for those few tiny moments, food makes some of it right.

I’ve searched for other solutions, but to food I keep coming back,
so look deeper than just my surface – my pain is displayed in my fat.

© ceenoa

 

“On this Day” Repost – I don’t do Math

I may have mentioned once of twice my favourite FB feature – NO?  Oh, well it is “on this Day” – and on this day in 2014 I wrote the following post.  Strangely enough, today my FB feed has been full of posts of a similar nature; learning to be, living in the moment, being happy.  The Universe does work in mysterious ways – and it pays to pay attention unless you want a kick up the backside.

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What does it all add up too?
the seconds of my life,
count them off in gratitude,
daughter, sister, mother, wife.

No number can ever tally,
the measure of our worth,
the answer is in living well,
each day upon the earth.

“On this Day” Repost – The Dog

Facebook has one good feature – “On This Day”, and it’s reminded me why I’m feeling a bit …”off” … today.  My original post can be found here.

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The dog takes me for a walk,   
pulling against the leash,
strong and determined,
straining to break free.

We only walk in winter,
the dog and I,
weather grey and gloomy,
under short day skies.

My dog is black.

© ceenoa

“On This Day” Repost – The Ginger Jar

Facebook has one good feature, (don’t get me started on how many BAD features it has), in that it gives you the “blast from the past” in it’s “On This Day” feature.  I enjoy seeing what I was posting years ago, and today this little poem caught my eye and I found myself thinking “that’s not too shabby”.

So, here’s a little something I posted on 21 March 2014.

The Ginger Jar

It wasn’t where I left it,
I’d looked on every shelf,
“I would swear, I left it there”,
I muttered to myself.

It wasn’t in the cupboard,
I only found a sock,
it wasn’t in the garden
buried underneath the rocks.

I looked under the table,
but I couldn’t see it there,
I even took the cushions off
each and every chair.

“Where could you be?”, I said to me
– it didn’t answer back,
and just “because”, I had a look
inside the old spice rack.

It was nestled at the bottom
of the musty ginger jar,
I tipped it out, then dropped it,
but it didn’t roll too far.

I picked it up and held it,
and told it what I thought,
that I’d be lost without it,
and my days be without worth.

I twisted it and pushed it,
put it back where it belonged,
for a day without some humour
is a day that is too long.

© Ceenoa