SOD #4

I know, I have been remiss (and missing in action) with my Thursday SODding, but hey, WordPress has reminded me how weird they are today:

SOD

He wasn’t really sure that robots had a happy place, but he was certain that if they did it wouldn’t have been getting stuffed into a huge chunk of fish fillet and chucked off the end of a boat into a pack of feeding sharks just so some scientist could attmempt to monitor his progress through the belly of the beast.  Luckily, or not,  he didn’t have long to philosophise about where his actual happy place might be, before he was swallowed up by the one of the sharks, who was definitely in his happy place crunching fish fillet flavoured with robots.

If you want to find out what SOD really means – read this post

Advertisements

The Loo

WARNING:     If you don’t like “toilet” humour (and I mean that literally) – move along now! 

This verse has been nagging me to write it for days since the “visit”- so I finally gave in and decided to traumatise you all as well. 

**************

there’s a poo in my loo!
it had been well hid, till I lifted the lid,
and a poo in the loo,
when you go for a wee, is not something you want to see.

oh, that poo in the loo,
who left it there? and do I really care?
but the poo in the loo,
says they need a lesson, in remembering to push the button!

so the door to the room of the poo in my loo
now displays note, on which I wrote:
you left a poo in my loo –
next time don’t rush, and remember to FLUSH!

© ceenoa

I skipped the visuals for this one – it just seemed the appropriate thing to do!

 

“Suggestions” Opportunity Dare

Following on from my last post – you can read it here – I had a thought, which I only thought briefly, but then “The Editor” (let’s just call her TE for brevity, I’m a lazy typist) over at The Lockwood Echo dared to type the thought I had been thinking.  I suspect this is because she has been associating for too long with the author of a certain column in the Lockwood Echo (OK, that has to be shortened to “TLE” – you know why!)   So, basicall TE from TLE stole my thought and typed it – and it was good.  (You still following?  Good!)

TE typed:

Toddlers, Cute, Mountain Biking.
As soon as I saw your post title I scrolled up to see what mine were today. I too get some wild suggestions that bear no relationship to each other or what I read. I don’t use searches, so maybe that’s why they’re so random! I like the idea they could be a secret code. We should use them as prompts, in the style of Mr Lageose’s Bonnywood 3 Word Challenge. 😉

Now, she mentioned a certain name, and a certain challenge, that some may already be familiar with.  If not, you really need to go and check it out.  Brian is wickedly witty, snarky, word-savvy, thoughtful, caring, and just plain nice – all rolled into one good blogger.  You can find the genisis of the 3 Word Challenge here

So, I thought, “Why Not?”.  (well, there is probably many reason why not, but I decided to ignore them anyway).  So here is my little “Suggestions Opportunity Dare” – yes, ….wait for it …. – it’s too long to type again so I’m just going to call it SOD (it quirks me).

SOD is easy, you just open up the WordPress Reader on the nominated day (or any day really, if you don’t like rules) and look for the “Suggestions” at the top.

Capture

So, for me, today’s second suggestions are Homeschool, Love, Robots.  I then make a post using those words, for (a hideous) example:

The Authorities have announced a crack-down on the multitude of unlicensed ‘Homeschool Repair Shops for Love Robots’ that have sprung up all over the country since the production of rubber was totally banned.

If you would like to have a go, you need to do the following simple steps:

  • check your reader for the “Suggestions”- (it helps if you DON’T have any TAGS listed for search on your sidebar in the reader, as that way you get the full random selection effect)
  • write your post, tag it as SOD (or use the full name: Suggestions Opportunity Dare).
  • add a link to your post, or a pingback to this post, in the comments below if you want to – you don’t have to, but if we can’t find your post, we can’t enjoy it!

Just because I like a little bit of structure, (and I need something to generate a regular post with at the moment) I’m going to do a SOD each Thursday, but you can choose any day the whimsy takes you.

If you’re interested, come join in and see what you can make out of SOD.

I  DARE you!

Wordpress Suggestions

Anyone else ever notice those “suggestions” at the top of your reader?

I noticed them a while back, when one day it had some weird topic (can’t remember what it was exactly now) which made me go WHAT?!

I’ve been keeping an eye on mine today, pondering the offerings, and I really wonder about what sort of algorithm they are using, or is it just totally random?

Todays’ suggestions – in between reading posts are as follows:

Suggestions#1: Pride, Robots, Colorado.
Suggestions#2: Farm, DIY, Books.
Suggestions#3: Robots, Batman, Psychology.
Suggestions#4: Sharks, Vegan, Politics. 

I think it’s the combinations that get me – #4 is particularly quirky, with the poor Vegans bracketed by sharks on both sides.

Perhaps WordPress is sending some secret code out to us all – if only we knew how to interpret it.

‘Neath the Bed

I went a little mad today,
and vacuumed ‘neath the bed,
it’s not my normal housework style,
to clean what can’t be seen,
i’m more a fan of neat and tidy,
and a quick superficial clean.

but I’d bought a brand new vacuum,
– so I had to try it out –
it’s an upright, with a lift off can,
and a sucky spout!
so I used it on the skirting boards,
and then glimpsed beneath the bed.

oh, I know that I should do it,
much more often than I do,
but it’s such a major undertaking,
and ignorance is bliss,
until the carpet changes colour,
which is a sign that you can’t miss.

so I had to move my heavy bed,
and push it round the room,
I might have moved it ten times,
’cause in the end I just lost track,
and I suppose that it was worth it,
though i’ve gone and hurt my back.

So here there is a lesson,
if you’re just a bit like me,
do not buy a brand new vacuum,
and test it in your room,
and do not look beneath your bed,
else you might meet a dusty doom.

© ceenoa

Lies – A Short Paragraph Story

I desperately rack my brain trying to come up with a plausible story, the guilt making me feel sick with the taste of these not yet spoken untruths. “I lost track of time”, “It took longer to finish the (insert word of choice: shopping, appointment) than I expected” and “I’m meeting a friend for coffee” have been worn out too many excuses ago.  Suddenly I’m tired of all the deception, the lip service of commitment and the half-hearted attention I have been paying to this relationship for too long.  I make a silent vow to change my ways:  I will devote more time to you; I will ignore the lure of this new love; I will speak the truth.  So I do:  “I have been unfaithful to my cleaning duty, but I promise I will not “Art” today and I WILL do the damn housework”.  (Yet, even as I think it, I taste the sourness of lies).

© ceenoa

Driving to work thoughts

I saw a sign on one of the local churches driving through town this morning which really didn’t make much sense to me (and I read it 3 times to make sure what I was seeing actually computed in my brain) it said:

“Faith without evidence is just superstition”

I thought (religious) faith was more this definiton:

“strong belief in the doctrines of a religion, based on spiritual conviction rather than proof.”

This church usually displays a clever play on words/current happenings in their messages, so this one has been bugging me all day, is there some secret inverted* meaning that I missed?

*Writing this I just thought to read the message backwards:  “Superstition just is evidence without Faith”  – but that doesn’t even make sense because superstition usually doesn’t have any evidence!

“a widely held but irrational belief in supernatural influences, especially as leading to good or bad luck, or a practice based on such a belief.”

Oh well, just another small mystery of life I guess.

Inventive Language

I’m thinking about recording a new language – I’ve got 2 words so far this week!  (I didn’t say it was going to be a very verbose language, now did I?)

Of course, you may have already had some exposure to the first word in my new language, from this post earlier in the week, and I am glad to report that “irky” seems to have been well received.  By the way, it is pronounced irk-ee? (and it absolutely must have the rising inflection emphasis of the question mark on the ee, otherwise it just sounds silly!)

So, pluffelled (ooh, there’s another word – now I have 3) up with the exuberance for new words, my brain threw this one up/out tonight:

SPLODDELLED  (splod-delled)

For those folks who might be having trouble grasping the meaning of this fine new word – and let’s face it, who wouldn’t – I have bunged it into some context in the following sentence:   “I sploddelled my wine on my desk when I lifted up the glass too fast”.
Yes, fine linguists everywhere, cringe at the monstrosity that is my brain trying to describe events of wine spillage!

Oh, and in case you might be wondering about my third word, pluffelled (pluff-elled), which I just birthed above – it means “puffed up like a proud peacock displaying it’s plumage”. Sounds exactly like that, don’t you think?

So, there you have it – 3 new words for my brand new language – now I only need to find a name for my language, any suggestions?